that's all?
by Iwannagetitwrite
Summary: the Question shows superman how to interrogate copperhead. plus other one shots.
1. Chapter 1

_Reviews welcome._

Copperhead; thief, part snake, and irritation in superman's side. He was sitting in the interrogation room of the justice league watch tower. Superman watched him from behind the mirror, wishing to laser his hand off or something. He couldn't even look at him without hearing the words 'boy scout'. Why do those words sound like an insult coming from that smug face? The ugly villain flicked his serpentine tongue and smiled a toothy grin at the mirror, "morning boy scout." superman's eye twitched. Just then the interrogator walked in. Kara? Why is she doing it? Following her was the Question. "oh look, it's the girl scout. What, gonna give me a makeover? And stinky! How are you? Your girlfriend still hasn't ran out of fabreeze yet?" the Question didn't react, Supergirl just huffs and sticks her tongue out, "no, I'm here to learn how to get you to talk." he smiles, "good luck with that."

the Question sits on the table, "what is Luthor's plan?"

"why would I tell you?"

he pulls a check out of his pocket.

Copperhead takes it, "only 500?" Question looks at him, "another hundred if you sabotage it."

his eyes light up, "hardball? Deal."

"Supergirl, could you escort him off the station?"

"what?!" Supergirl yelled confused.

"that's all it takes?!" superman complains. Copperhead leaves.

Two hours later Luthor's plan falls apart.


	2. don't kill the kitty

Don't kill the kitty

 _(this is at the end of the episode, Injustice for all.)_

Cheetah is grabbed by Grundy by the scarf and dragged to the alleyway to be petted to death. Per Luthor's orders. Just as Grundy was about to rip her fur off, a wheezy voice stops him, "Don't kill the kitty."

"And why not?" Grundy asks looking at the shadowy figure.

The figure reveals himself to be a helmet-less Copperhead spinning a pair of cuffs and missing gloves, "We need her alive."

Grundy thinks his words over, "But Luthor said..."

"Luthor won't be able to pay us in ten minutes, so his orders are pointless." Copperhead answered walking closer, "So let the pretty kitty go."

"What makes you think he'll listen to you, Copper?" Cheetah asks after failing to free her tail from Grundy's grasp.

Copperhead leans close to her face, "Because, I'm the only one who can escape from under the league's masked noses. And I have a job offer that both of you would like." he stands up and listens for the police sirens, "I'll get you guys out in an hour."

"Are you doing this to impress me?" Cheetah asks as Grundy drops her.

"Nah, I'm not going to bother, besides, I prefer working with those I can trust. I don't trust pushovers." Copperhead answers as the cops pile in.

In the police transport...

Cheetah leans closer to Copperhead and whispers, "Why me and Grundy?"

Copperhead leans close, "You're brains and he's muscle, all I got is skill. If you like, you can quit, I'm not stopping you." he leans back and pops off the electro-cuffs. Cheetah thinks it over and studies him before finalizing her decision.

Inside the prison...

Copperhead pops his head out of her cell air vent, "Ready to go?"

"Yes, under one condition."

"What?"

"No dates."

he thinks it over, "You drive a hard bargain." he pops back in. after a moments wait he opens the door, "Lady's first."

"Now we get Grundy?" she asks walking out.

"Now we get Grundy." he smiled.


	3. place your bets

Place your bets

Superman walks into a high-security prison and passes the camera room. He stops and backs up, then peeks in and listens. "Ten bucks he escapes through the vent." one cop said pointing at a screen.

Another one walks up and taps on a different screen, "He tried that last time he escaped."

"Twenty if he squeezes through the food slot, and gets out in under a minute." a girl cop said dunking a cookie into her cup of coffee.

"What are you betting on?" Superman asked walking in.

"Copperhead. Every time he comes in, he gets out. It's kinda fun, cause he always finds a way to escape, making it easier to find flaws in the system. Betting on how just makes it more fun." a cop with Dave on his name tag explained from his seat in front of the screens.

"That's... well, you're going to have to quit your betting. Copperhead's not going to escape any time soon." Superman said leaving.

"I take it that Superman only fought him once." Dave commented getting back to work. Superman frowns, but keeps walking.

Superman walks into the interrogation room, "Hello, Copperhead."

the half snake man smiles at him, "Morning boyscout. Let me guess, you want to know where to find my current boss?"

Superman sits across from him, "Yes, can you deliver without mockery?"

Copperhead thinks about it, "Hmm, no."

Superman leaves the room and watches in relief as some cops drag Copperhead down the hall. He turns and walks past the camera room. He stop when the cops he spoke with earlier start talking. Dave laughs, "Okay, pay up you two. Copperhead escaped before he reached his cell."

"And right from under Superman's nose." the girl commented handing him fifty dollars, "Here, and Jack gets ten."

"I guess that means our cells are getting harder to break out of."

Superman walks out and flies over the prison, spots Copperhead, and snags him off the ground, "I'm taking you somewhere you can't escape." he taps his com, "Watchtower, two to beam up."

Copperhead lands face first into a white cell with a forcefield door. Superman dusts off his hands and walks away. Once in the lunchroom he grabs a plate of food. Right before he could sit, he overhears the Question, "Ten dollars if Copperhead escapes the cell, twenty if he leaves the ship."

Superman, confident that Copperhead would fail, goes and sits next to the Question, "You're on."

Green arrow sat across from them, "Fifty if no one spots him until it's too late."

"With this many heroes around, he'll just be lucky if he can get just his head into the vent." Superman says taking a spoonful of mashed potatoes.

Suddenly Martian Manhunter's voice pops through the speakers, "Copperhead has escaped cell block four and is stealing a quin jet."

Superman chokes on potatoes in surprise, "What!?"

"Got fifty buck?" Green Arrow asked smugly.

He digs in his pocket and hands it to them, "I got out witted by a snake."

the Question smiles, "Not surprised, it is Copperhead."

"Correction, you got out smarted by a nut in a snake costume." Green Arrow said counting his money.

Superman buries his head into his arms and groans, "Don't rub it in."


	4. a villainous thanksgiving

_I know it's not thanksgiving yet but this sounded like a funny idea._

 _I don't know the names of some of the characters._

"I was thinking of making my mother's cranberry sauce." the Russian lady with the dragon tattoo says.

Luthor waves his hand in a circle, "yes, whatever. Why did you talk me into this?"

Copperhead smiles, "and I'll make a..."

Luthor snaps at him, "don't you dare cook anything!"

"bouquet." he finished, less enthusiastically.

"Grundy want pizza." Solomon Grundy announced.

Luthor rolls his eyes, "do what you please, just keep Copperhead out of the kitchen."

the Russian lady nods and walks away with the half-snake, "maybe you could help Polaris with the decorating..."

Thanksgiving.

Over a hundred villain's chatter falls silent when Luthor bangs a gong. They all look at him, hungry, angry, hangry, and bored. "thank you for attending this feast. I thank the many cooks, none of who were Copperhead." half the room cheers, the other hisses. "today we feast, tomorrow we destroy the justice league once and for all!" everyone cheers. "now eat!"

they all fight over the food, filling their plates to overflowing. Copperhead and Grundy sat at (and ate most of) the girls table. Cheetah smacks Copperhead when he tries to eat the turkey whole. "for one day of the year could you eat like a normal person?"

Polaris stares jealously at them, "why do they get all the girls?"

Shade steals his plate, "perhaps because they're on the bottom of the ladder."

he steals it back, "yeah right."

"the more important we think we are, the less time we spend with the girls." Shade gulps a spoonful of potatoes. "I for one am grateful he didn't cook."

"why's that? Everything he cooks is delicious." he shoves peas in his mouth.

"he cooks rats."

Polaris chokes.

Toy man takes a spoonful of cranberry sauce and flings it. The gooey mass hits Sinestro in the face.

Toy man laughs, "got you!"

Sinestro growls, he creates a scoop full of mashed potatoes. He throws it at the tiny man, who dodges. It gets all over the back of Giganta's dress. She turns and snarls, "who did that?"

Toy man points at Sinestro. She picks up a handful of peach cobbler and flings it at him. He makes a construct that deflects it. A random person shouts "food fight!" and chaos ensues. Food and powers fly about the room.

Two hours later.

The fight was over, people were strewn about the place. Those that were still standing chatted as they drank alcohol. Volcana finds the com system and contacts the justice league, "hi! Guess what we did?" she giggles drunkenly, "we had a party, and you weren't invitedddd."

"what do you want?" Martian Manhunter asks.

"do you wanna join? It at a warehouse... somewhere." giggles, "come and find us." she turns it off.

Martian Manhunter sighs, and contacts the other leaguers, "the villains are helpless and can be easily caught."

"where?" Batman asks.

"how?" superman asks.

"they had a party and are either drunk or unconscious. They are in a warehouse."

"I'll find them." Batman signals off.

All of the villains wake up in jail with massive hangovers. Except Copperhead whose metabolism was still processing the one cup he had. He stumbles around, sluring, "I love you guys." then flops on his face.

Luthor stands, "ow... next time, we just steal gold."

"here, here." Polaris mumbles.

 _LOL, Please review._


End file.
